You gotta know it's tempting to just tell the story, but there's a problem, I don't remember most of it. I was heavily sedated much of the time and am rapidly forgetting the rest of it.
Here's something I'm not forgetting. I am now an ex-smoker. I want to say that in public. Of course I still really want to smoke.
I figured something out in the hospital. I'm the kind of person who likes to solve problems by smoking. How do I know this? Because every time my mind encounters a problem it says “OK, I'll just have a cigarette then.” I bet a lot of other cigarette smokers deal with problems the same way. Now that I don't smoke, I still have the idea that smoking will help me deal with problems. It's funny, one part of my brain has figured out that this is wrong (in fact smoking causes more problems than it solves) but a deeper part of my brain still believes it. This leads to some funny arguments inside my brain. But so far so good. I got to go through the worst of the withdrawal in a hospital where there was no possibility of smoking, and now the craving seems manageable. No doubt other people have smoking stories to tell. I was one of the lucky ones, I survived to tell my story. So far so good.
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